Gareth Bale showed seemingly superhuman speed last night to fly through the Barcelona defence and net Real Madrid’s Copa del Rey winner. According to my highly scientific and hugely reliable data, it took the €100m man 8.12 seconds to sprint the length of the Barcelona half. Pretty impressive, right?
But, I hear you cry, someone should really look into how fast that is in comparison to other sportsmen across the world. Someone, preferably, with too much spare time on their hands. So, with my dissertation firmly set to the back of my mind, I went in search of some – all be they juvenile – answers.
Firstly, judging by Usain Bolt’s 100m (9.58 seconds) world record, the Jamaican could, theoretically, have ran the length of the Barcelona half in a mere 4.81 seconds. Frighteningly quick. Whilst, Carlin Isles, hailed as the fastest rugby player on earth in recent years, would have picked up a slender time of just 5.14 seconds (judged upon his past record over 100m).
But, back to football: Bale’s impressive run reminded many of a similarly dazzling goal scored by another Welsh wizard. A certain Ryan Giggs ran half the length of Highbury in 1999 in a time that would have seen him complete the stretch of the Barcelona half in 8.97 seconds; taking into account, of course, his ability to dart past the Arsenal defenders as he went.
Diverting again away from football (sorry), David Trick and Brian Habana – who hold certain prestige in the rugby world as two of the quickest players ever to grace the field – have both recorded times of 10.4 seconds over 100m. Therefore, they would have taken a meagre 5.22 seconds to conquer half the length of the pitch. And (breathe) back to football: Bale’s counterpart, Cristiano Ronaldo, was clocked running 96m in 10 seconds against Athletico Madrid in 2012. Consequently, the Portuguese, when travelling without a ball at his feet, could have galloped through the Barcelona players in an impressive 5.23 seconds.
Back away from football again (last time, I promise) Chris Johnson holds the record for the fastest 40-yard dash in the NFL at 4.24 seconds, with Dri Archer getting close to that last year when he ran 4.26. Both these men would have penetrated Barcelona’s half in 5.31 and 5.33 seconds respectively. That’s rather quick.
A somewhat bizarre comparison (and another non-football one. Sorry, I lied) shows that MS Dhoni, who is known for his speed between the wickets, can run the length of a wicket in 3.08 seconds. Therefore, hypothetically speaking, if he were to continue at that speed, the Indian captain would have whirlwinded through half of the Mestalla’s pitch in approximately 6.22 seconds. Surprising faster than Bale, however without the detour past the water bottles that Marc Batra forced the Welshman to take.
Although Dhoni appears to have Bale within his sights, the 24-year-old can be safe in the knowledge that he shan’t be caught by The Special One. José Mourinho put down a time of 12.45 seconds last week to join in the festivities after Demba Ba’s last-minute Champions League winner. Surprisingly, despite his greying hair, Mourinho only added 0.92 seconds to the last time he completed such a celebration. Ten years ago – when he was endearing rather than darn right annoying – he clocked a time of 11.53 seconds at the Theatre of Dreams as his Porto minnows defeated Fergie’s Manchester United side.
So, there you have it, Bale is faster than José Mourinho. Groundbreaking stuff.
*If my data doesn’t appear very trustworthy to you then just have a quick glance at my table. Everything looks better with a table. Convinced? Thought not.
With interference
MS Dhoni: 6.22 secs
Gareth Bale: 8.12 secs
Ryan Giggs: 8.97 secs
Without interface
Usian Bolt: 4.81 secs
Yohan Blake: 4.86 secs
Carlin Isles: 5.14 secs
Bryan Habana: 5.22 secs
David Trick: 5.22 secs
Cristiano Ronaldo: 5.23 secs
Chris Johnson: 5.31 secs
Dri Archer: 5.33 secs
José Mourinho at Old Trafford: 11.53 secs
José Mourinho at Stamford Bridge: 12.45 secs
George Martindale 